The days just fly by. I wish I had more time to visit here but it's been a busy few days. Master has multiple clients in town so I have been errand girl extrodanaire! We haven't had time for kinks and giggles even. The quick taste I get of Master in the morning has been all we've done for ohhhh...5 days now. Must be some kind of record. The morning ritual of service always keeps me centered though, and at the end of the day, when the work is done, and I'm tucked into Master with His arm draped around me and we are just falling asleep, to hear "Good night my slave" is enough for me. I can't wait until Friday and Saturday as Master is taking the days off and we are going away for two days. Two days of Master to myself. I am giddy with excitement!! I adore Him so very much. I am so honored to belong to Him!

Well....back to work unfortunately. Have a wonderful day everyone. Be safe.

Although I love love love the "beyond normal" things Master does to me; you know; the bondage and whippings; the humiliation and spankings...all the kinky stuff...yeah. it's amazing.

That being said, I also am crazy about the normal missionary sex with Master. I absolutely love the way it feels when Master is on top of me. I love the way the coarse hair on His legs and chest rub against my soft skin. The way He nuzzles His lips on my neck. I love how he holds most of His weight off of me, yet there's just enough pressure on my body to make me feel small... not in a bad way...you know like covered...protected. God, and I so love it when His mouth finds my breasts; when I feel the wet heat of His mouth wrap around my nipple! It is so arousing. But the feeling that blows the rest away is always that moment...the one where He's already taken His knee and pushed my thighs apart. That moment when He guides Himself in; when it's just the head of His cock inside me...that moment before He buries Himself deep into my soul...That moment of anticipation is pure bliss. Vanilla sex can be good ya know! LOL

By the way...Can I please work for a company that gives me bonuses based on performance...and then perform so badly; make such bad investments that I cause the company to be on the brink of bankruptcy...fail so epically that the "little" people have to give my company money so as not to collapse the economy...and after that can I take that money and get my million plus bonus anyway? Can I please? Yes makes perfect sense to me!

Oh. no....wait I know... I'll go to all my friends and their friends and famous people even...and I'll get them to give me hundreds, no thousands...hell, MILLIONS of dollars and tell them I'm gonna invest it for them; cause you know; I got street cred and all...I'm a very intelligent person you know...damn near a genius... and then I'll just buy oh I don't know...yachts and cars and fucking Park Avenue Penthouses and I'll think you are all so stupid that you won't miss your life savings you trusted me with. Yeah...thats the job I want!!

Why are we not kickin ass and taken names??? I'm just asking.

There... I feel much better now!

To Love, Honor, and Obey... If you're Husband and wife, this means a lot. If you are Master/slave...the meaning becomes all the more profound.

I feel so much more bound to the "laws" of M/s then I do to the "laws" of marraige. Of course these are my opinions based on my relationship and the ones I observe, but it seems many married couples have the love part down; but the Honor and Obey part has long ago been abandoned.

I Honor Master when I clean His home. I Honor Master when I take care of myself. When I diet and exercise and keep myself in a way that makes Him proud of me.

I Honor Master when I behave in the way He expects....I'm quiet when I need to be, I'm subserviant as much as I can be; beyond that, I respect that He is Master and try to the best of my ability to give Him the power it requires. I don't see women in the relationships I observe scratching the surface of this.

As for obey. Seriously...most of our aquaintances that are married didn't even use the word in their ceremony.

It's critical...absolutely critical to a M/s relationship. If you want more than s/m sex, or more than just "scening" the M/s vibe...then obey has to be you're mantra as a slave.

I'm not saying it's easy...especially at first. When He tells you it's time for bed, and you want to stay up longer...obey.

When He says this is what we are watching on television tonight...obey

When He chooses italian over chinese...obey.

When He tells you to wait in the car until He returns...obey

If He tells you to strip in the living room while He watches baseball...obey!

I think you get where I'm going here. You can't just pick and choose when you want to be submissive. You can't be "slavelike"when your in the mood for an orgasm. If its what you want...it's what you want when you don't want as well.

You'll mess up; at times you will disappoint your Master...but make a true effort to Honor and Obey as much as possible...

Well, unfortunately, the shuttle launch was scrubbed. There's always that chance... more times than not there is a delay of some sort. We'll see if it's a go tonight.

Dinner was still nice outdoors though. In a matter of weeks if not days it will be too hot to eat outdoors so we will enjoy it now. Although I don't look foward to the high humidity and smoldering hot days, I do look foward to skinny dipping in the pool. It's such an exotic feeling to be naked in the pool in the middle of the night.

kita-Dove said something in my blog yesterday that caused reflection. She mentioned that it seemed as if slavery was incorporated in all that I do.

It's true...so very true. It wasn't always though. I didn't just poof into slavegirl mode. I can't stress enough to those who want this... to obtain it in a daily lifestyle level, it has to happen gradually. I have belonged to Master since I was 19. Those early years were at times a challenge. There were power plays and on again off again situations. There were times He was more demanding and I wasn't ready; as well as times I needed Him to take more control when He wasn't ready. We even tried to do away with the concept of M/s and just be Husband and wife.

It always came back to the fact that neither one of us could function without it. I felt lost and exposed without the warmth of His dominance. He felt frustrated and empty without His power to control. We were both unfulfilled in so many ways without the M/s relationship, we had no choice but to make it work.

I compare our process to what you do when you know you are allergic to something, but you don't know what. So you strip your diet down til its as bland as possible. Then you add something new, gradually, a few days at a time to see if it makes you sick. If it doesn't, you keep adding and taking away until you level yourself off to your own best tolerance. You tweak and adjust until it all just feels right to you.

Now its so much a part of my life that I don't think about it. I don't wake up every morning and say...o.k.... Time to be in slave mode. Or...Masters gone most all of today so I don't have to be a slave. Its such a mindset...it's so much a part of what is me that... it just is.

I have always been naturally submissive...always. I took that trait and I ran with it; It was a hard road honestly until I found Master. I was too afraid at a young age to tell anyone what I needed, hell, I didn't know what it was. The first time I gathered the nerve to ask for anything remotely kinky was when I was studying for math finals with my boyfriend at the time. We were taking a break and making out and I asked him if he would take the ruler that was on the desk and spank me with it. He laughed it off and said he wasn't my daddy. I didn't want my daddy to spank me, I wanted him too! Needless to say I was mortified! I had finally put a voice on what was swimming in my head and in doing so was not only rejected, but laughed at.

So the boyfriend and I fizzled out soon after; not because of that really, we were 17 and both very new at sex. He was my first in fact. I knew though I needed to find an older man. I'll write more about that later....meeting Master...

The point I was making in this epic digression was that after years of serving master...years of rules and protocol...years to fit into this most comfortable skin of submission and slavery...it is what we make it...it is what it is...and I don't take a single day of it for granted.

I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought,

but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones.

Albert Einstein (1879-1955)

A beautiful day! Ever have one of those days when you just feel good. When everything just seems to be flowing well. I awakened this morning and it just felt that way.

I quietly slipped out of bed...grabbed my robe and headed for the kitchen. Thanks to the time change it looks like the middle of the night at 5:30 but it allowed me the most breathtaking view of the moon while retrieving the paper from the driveway. It was huge and full (tonight actually) and a creamy yellow. It was magical....it looked as if i could just reach a little further I could touch it. Such beauty in the moon.

Not much time for moon gazing though, as I needed to bring Master His coffee and wake Him with His morning leg/foot rub. A serious accident in His 20's is starting to cause discomfort in them so I give Him hot lotion or oil massages every morning before work. Besides...I love rubbing Him...touching Him....running my hands over His calves and hearing His groans of approval please me as much as it does Him. I love to be the catalyist of His pleasure.

Time constraints don't allow for a lengthy massage so I finish up and slide up to the middle and take Him in my mouth. Just a quick 5 minutes of tasting Him. A few minutes to convey how much I want...need Him; and it puts Him in a good mood...cause come on... if you have to get out of bed at 6 a.m...fellatio certainly softens the blow...( oh look, I made a funny)

Theres a shuttle launch tonight. I'm planning an outside dinner so we can watch it fly to the heavens. We live almost an hour away from the launch site but we can still see it from our home. It looks like a sun racing straight up...the booster rockets fall away, 2 points of light falling back down. We've seen it many times and it still leaves you awestruck.

So, now I have to go so I can plan out my menu. Lots to do before Master returns.

Although I am forgiven when I don't follows Masters wishes, it doesn't often go without penalty. Even though I tried my best to not cum before Him, I failed at doing so. I still lack that discipline as a slave. There are times I can hold back my orgasms; yet there are times I can't. of course Master pulls the strings and knows how to make me go over...whether He tells me I can or not; it still falls on me to obey, even in the throes of ectasy.

So, first off, no orgasms for a few days at least....(crap)

Writings....ugggh... 3 pages, college rule...:" Why It's Important For My slave to Follow Direction"

These are always frustrating as He doesn't even read them. I just kneel in front of Him and read it outloud to Him.

Then He destroys it in someway that usually entails more "correction" for me.

Some advice for slaves... Beware of a Virgo/ Driver Master.

It makes your life a challenge at best...lol

I posted last nights adventures in forum as I think more people read those than the blogs. I want everyone to know I got lucky last night...lol.

It all started with a face slap. It's intriguing to me as to why things like that turn me on so much. I can not even have sex on my mind ( really...it happens) but seriously, I can be in a whole other place mentally and Master can do certain things that instantaneously will have me foaming at the mouth like Pavlovs dogs. Some of these things are as follows but not limited to

1) Face slapping

2) Grabbing me by the hair and roughly pulling me back.

3) Wrapping His hand around my throat and squeezing.

4) certain verbal abuse "phrases" like " Who the fuck do you think you are cunt?" ... " Get to your knees now and kiss your Masters feet" or my all time fav..." The only time I want to see your mouth open today is when its wrapped around my cock" That one makes me wet just to type it. There's also the one when we're in a public place and He will pull my hair away from my ear and whisper, " In a matter of hours you will be hanging by your wrists on the hook, twirling around why I cover you with stripes with my whip...and you'll beg for every lash won't you slave?"

God...He just mesmerizes me with His words.

I often wonder why though. I've thought off and on over the years about having therapy. Not to make me not want these things. God no...that willl NEVER happen.

Just to find out why. I don't though because I don't think i could trust that the therapist wasn't some prude who thought all people like me were wackanuts!

So I'll just be kinky and live with it...lol

When we were visiting our families over my break from slavefarm, the hardest thing for me to suppress was the way I addressed Master. We have assumed these roles; and I don't even like calling them roles because that insunates that it isn't real; that we are only "scening" the M/s scenerio. That isn't at all the case. There are sexual fantasies and kinks we do act out and bring to life when the mood strikes, but the Master slave aspect of our relationship is very real. It's a tangible daily occurence that we have built on year after year. It's a physical, mental, emotional entity that has so entertwined itself in our psyche that it goes to the core of us now. To call him Master is so familar to me that not calling Him that feels odd. To use His given name feels like i'm talking to or about someone else. It's just who He is to me. The man...The Master... one in the same.

Anyway, I digressed greatly there... I would have to constantly make a conscious effort to not have "Master" tripping merrily off my tongue. I soon replaced it with honey or His name but I missed so much hearing myself call Him Master and seeing the approval on His face at the respect He was being shown.

Of course when we had private time I would whisper it softly but if you knew our families you would know how rare private time was. As much as I love seeing them all, it was wonderful when we returned home and I could once again do the things that made me feel whole; the things that make me feel that all is right with my world at least; something as poignantly simple as ...  Yes Master

A beautiful cool morning here in sunny Florida. I cherish them so as the blistery hot days will soon be upon us. I enjoy those as well, but they last much longer than the cool days.

I made Master brunch yesterday. Spoiled Him in the manner He so deserves. He relaxed out by the pool with His paper and coffee, while I made him a hearty omelette with canadian bacon, swiss cheese, sauted onions and a dash of fresh nutmeg. To accompany the omelette I braised some small red potatoes, crushed them slightly and spooned sauted garlic and onions over top of them. Cinnamon toast and sliced kiwi and star fruit along with fresh squeezed honeybells finished off this Master pleasing meal.

As we lounged outdoors and soaked in the morning I was so grateful for the few hours the whole world stopped and we were able to just be. After we ate, I knelt by the end of his chair; well, kinda sit really as it was a better angle; and rubbed his feet and calves with almond oil. He didn't order me to, or even ask me to. It's the dynamic of us...He leads I follow. He dominates, I submit.He protects, guides, and teaches. I respect, honor, serve, and obey. Our roles are so well defined...so much a part of us; that I don't need to be told every little move; and I don't want to be. I want Him to take pride in His slave. To know that she takes the iniative to please Him because she wants to; not because He orders it.

Hope everyone is well and taking the time to enjoy each other.