This blog is long, it's personal and it's a bit of a rant.
It's not really written for anyone else, it's just some things that I felt a need to put down in words for my own sake and maybe some of you will understand my thoughts, however unorganized they are.

I wrote this partially because I really don't agree with some things that I've read lately and partially because I think some need to understand that what's told in public and how it is recieved may be different from what the person saying it is feeling. And that sometimes feelings are mixed, care and hate, love and dislike.

Today I've come home from a long weekend at Masters place.
I arrived at friday night around 9PM with a bag of clothes and things he had asked me to bring as well as some food stuff that I had picked up on my way to him.
The first glance I got of him as he opened the door took my breath away.
He was wearing a three piece Hugo Boss suit, his hair was slick back and the goatee freshly groomed.
Right away I felt under dressed, even though I wore a skirt, stockings, garter and a deep cut tank top under my jacket.

Since another post ended up talking about the rights and duties of slaves I decided to post these lists that I made up a while back. They are based on me and my Master and they are things that we have agreed upon to be a part of our relationship.
I am considered a slave and I do feel that I am one at heart, yet these rights I am still given and without them I would actually walk away from my beloved even though I don't want to do so. Luckily He agrees that these rights are some that I should have.

Unlike most people (or so it seems at least) I refuse to give new years resolutions. In stead I do my changes when I find them necessary.
However 2013 have turned out to be a year of big change.

It all started when I had my surgery in october last year and begin my weight loss. Or well, I began that about a month before surgery but still.
So far I've lost about 66 pounds and are going strong towards my ultimate goal, that I hope to reach sometime by the end of the year. I prefer taking it slow and feeling good while doing it.

I've thought about this for a few days, and come to a conclusion that won't be liked by most. However I feel it important to have reached this conclusion.
For my sake, for my development and the implementation of the inner self.

I've realized that I can't respect a man that lets his woman set rules for him.
I don't care if she's called girlfriend, wife, slave, slut, sub, fiancé, whore or what pronoun she wears.
A man that allows his woman to set rules regarding his rights to do things he wants to do is to me not a man and I can feel no respect for him.

We all have our dream of what slaves should be like and act like, what they should think and want and so on.

Some say slaves shouldn't have any opinions, that they should be dumb sluts that refers to everyone else with Sir, Master, Ma'm or so on.
Or that slaves are only good for fucking or abusing, that they have no right to say No to anyone and that they are stupid cunts or should act like it even if they aren't.

I am very happy to have a Master that enjoys my intelligence, that loves that I am opinionated and have a lot of knowledge about a lot of things.

Mail - fascination, conversation, exploration
Attraction, curiosity, interest, the first date

Date - falling in love, experiencing, understanding
Conversations, longing, trust, the first kiss

Session - trust, carefulness, hesitation
Relaxation, handcuffs, touch, the first hopefulness

Break - misunderstanding, tears, pain
Torment, regret, loneliness, bottomless heartache

Pause - crying, waiting, hoping
Surrender, depression,hopeless, trying to move on

Illness - panic, uncertainty, anger
Hope, acceptance, shaking, clearing things out

Joy - dating, loving, talking

Link to youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z9RRrHWooVM&list=UUxkFJOq4Yv70FqTqMZcMsKg
I guess you have to be a bit of a nerd to know who people in this video are, but if not I'm sure you can at least enjoy the parody of the original.

Happy new year everyone!

I wake up hearing your growl as you fill me with your cum.
Feeling a bit surprised and little confused before I really come around and realize what’s happening.
By the time I do so you’re already on your back in bed again, catching your breath. It’s not without a bit of effort to take advantage of a sleeping girl.
I feel a bit cheated of the goodies but I know that it’s not my pleasure that matters anyways so I just curl up on your arm and wish you a good morning in stead.

It's only christmas ones a year and even though neither Master or I are big christmas fans it's a holliday I love because I get to give him gifts. Sure I do so other times too, but it's more socially acceptable (as if I care what is and isn't) to do so this time of year.
This year it took me a while longer then usual to figure out what to get him, but eventually I got it just right. Can't say what it is though cause he might be reading this!