Very simply put it is a relationship like any relationship you meet, talk get to know each other. It does not matter if it is Dom/sub, Master/slave, Man/Women you do not just walk up to someone and say Ok respect me I'm your Dom/Master/Mate! You enter in a relationship with honesty in what you want what you expect and where you hope to go in the relationship.

i think the Dom/Master needs to earn your submission or the gift you will offer him.and like Stormbinder says she needs to earn her place as well. its a 2 way road.same like trust both need to earn it.

Hmmm. Yes?

I'm confused at the differences you're trying to juxtapose.

An act of submission is entirely on the sub/slave. The amount of time it takes to determine if you are comfortable enough to submit for any length of time is the variable. If the sub is not accepting to submit, that doesn't sound very consensual or fun. I don't know about the slave perspective though. Another can of wax.

Now whether there's "chasing" involved? If you like someone, you pursue them, just like in vanilla. Finding/arranging time to talk, spend time, banter and generally get a feel for the other person are ways to show interest. Assuming submission with little knowledge is a fantasy for some, but it's also mostly unrealistic, not impossible though.

Perhaps I missed your intent, but that's what I have to say about that.

-pip

I think that's only fair.

From the Dominant side, a submissive has to earn her place as well. At least with me she does. I'm sure some guys just take whatever is offered, but I'm not putting my collar or brand on anyone that doesn't deserve it. It takes a lot of work to keep a slave, so a guy has to be careful what he chooses.

There are things I look for and things that eliminate a sub right away.

Lies eliminate them. I can't have a girl who lies to me. If she tells me wretched things she has done, I can live with that. If she chats to other while I'm on with her, that's ok as long as she is honest and tells me. If she is going out with other men I can live with that too. She has to tell me about it. Be honest.

Trying to get me to do something by being pitiful is another one that gets them tossed out. If a girl is pitiful, why should I waste my time with her.

Laziness is another thing. If I tell her to do something and she doesn't because it's just too much trouble, what good is she? I'm just too much trouble for her so we're both better off.

There are more, but you get my drift. I think both parties should have standards and once they are together the standards should be adhered to. They to be constantly evaluated by the Dom, and I assume the sub will do the same.

It may seem a bit strict, but it is the way it should be.

-=Storm=-