The "I want a slave" syndrome
How many times have we seen it. A new Dom joins the site. They create a minimalist profile, age, gener, preference and maybe a location.
The very next thing they do (ok, maybe they masturbate to some of the pictures first, but I'm trying to be charaitable here) is post a status message that they are looking for a no-limts slave that they will beat and fuck, make them lick toilets and keep caged.
So being the charitable Son of a Bitch that I am, I drop a private note to the new Dom. Dude, you might want to put more in your profile before you advertize for a slave. Afterall, they will want to know something about you before they fall to their knees in front of you.
What do they send back to Me? "I just joined and haven't had time to fill out the profile yet." Are we churning out Stepford Doms? Really can't we be more imaginative than that? EVERYONE of You replies the same way. Are you cutting and pasting each other's reply?
So I got bold the other day and explained to one such Dom (who's username shall remain unsaid to protect the guilty), Dude, you had time to post a status message asking for a slave but not to fill out your profile? THe girls will want to know something about you, to gain trust in you first. You need to think with the big head between your shoulders and not the little one between your legs, they are trusting you with their lives, you need to earn that trust. Well this Dom did not take constructive suggestions well, told Me that I ruined the site for him and wants his account deleted. So I ask, is turning tail and running the sign of a Dominant? It's not like I threatened him bodily harm, I gave him suggestions for how to approach achieving his dream of finding a slave, and he ran away! Good Riddence. Grow up and try again, I say.
Gents, the moderators want to help you, but we also want the subs to be safe. If you're new to the Lifestyle, Welcome, we don't want to ban you from our circle, we want to teach you...help you...keep everyone safe in whatever extreme play you choose to participate in. But for God's sake don;t throw a tantrum and run. If you ego bruises that easily, this Lifestyle is NOT for you. You need to be in control...but you need to be in control of yourself first.
There are great resources on this site, and the Doms that reach out to help you are one of them. You are not an expert because you watched 300 hours of BDSM porn. But it doesn;t mean you can't become one.
Man Up dude. Are you ready?
(5 votes)
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Re: The "I want a slave" syndrome
To a point I agree. the post is well written and has good logical deduction based on the evidence on the site....If only we existed entirely on the world of cyberspace it may even be true. The reality is we do not exisit entirely on this web site. I do not consider myself a man of letters and I am not good or polished with writing or presenting myself through forums or chat. I suspect many subs if they judged solely upon the surface of this website would deduce me poser, or want to be (assuming they did not look at the pictures I have posted). But here I am flogging my wife and pushing needles through her flesh. Here I am with another sub coming to visit every wendsday and spending time in my cage, licking my feet, and lying at my feet in a corset. Why, because in real life, my body language, eyes, and manner, speech and aggressive action speak directly to submissives instinctual mind. Essential we are as sexual being far more then any profile could ever reveal. In addition poor sparse writing that is honest reveals far more then an extensive, well written, fantasy of a profile. I applaud your willing to help, but I can not help but notice your position of judgement in an arena that some may not be suited and conclusions based on what you already demonstrate is sparse evidence. I can understand the limitations of patience when all you see is the same sparse information and the same lame explinations. But I am a real person despite my few posts and limited messages and uncomfortability with posting and writing am I going to be judged and banned and excluded......Are you going to allow well written con artists to propagate this site just because they create "good" profile? I will personally with hold judgement until I meet someone in person. If I had not I never would have met painslave22 when she had nothing in her profile and no pictures and no posts at the time.
Peace and Blessings
BlackPhx
Re: The "I want a slave" syndrome
am i "truly submissive" if i have a deep desire to see these dudes publicly humiliated, flogged and perhaps branded? (by a super strong DOM, not me of course. though i would sit front row center to watch.)
because they can potentially ruin what seems like a potentially amazing thing.
Re: The "I want a slave" syndrome
You could write that again...
The Germans got a cute term for this kind of behaviour "Hirnkino" which translates nicely into "Braincinema".
Ok, everybody indulges now and then into a little fantasy, nothing wrong with that, but instead of posing as Dom´s or Master´s they should post whatever ideas they are dreaming to carry out in the "Dirty fantasies" forum.
Maybe, if well written and politely phrased, they could even catch the attention of a sub and at the very least earn some respect from other readers / members.
Don´t think there´ll ever be a remedy for those folks.
But anyway, it´s not only Dom´s you also have some newbie joined subs behaving the same way.
A honeypot always attracts bees and flies...
Re: The "I want a slave" syndrome
Good job man. Serious. Its annoying how many lonely guys think that by calling themselves a Dom or Master and saying they want a slave to live out their (unrealistic) Fantasy that women will just line up to submit. They don't realize the work it takes to be a Dom or Master or that things like no limit slave girls and real 24/7 slavery are the exception not the rule. I'm not surprised he ran. Its I always say the guys who talk the talk are scared shitless of the ones who walk the walk.
Understanding is the most powerful of both weapons and medicines
Re: The "I want a slave" syndrome
Well Said pip...always have to be careful of people new to the site. I have had my share of emails from people in "Swahililand" that joined 2 days prior, but that's on a different subject...
The Dom that runs away after one email from you is not a Dom but an immature child. A Dom has to be at least on equal intellectual footing with his sub; running away after one email doesn't qualify. Good riddance indeed!
Re: The "I want a slave" syndrome
>) yep agree
Re: The "I want a slave" syndrome
Issib,
I think we're in tandem to a point.
Each perspective being covered.
Moderators here are a great resource!
Dom'ing a Dom is an interesting dynamic. Doesn't sound like it went well.
Thanks for the info/advice/guidance.
-pip