The black hole that is "Someday"
slavegirl_drea's picture

Someday.

It's a word that seems to encompass such amazing possibilities... but really it's a lie W/we all tell O/ourselves born of fear and yearning. It's a far-off promise that W/we never really intend to keep. A hazy prize glittering in the future.

Someday... i'll find the time and motivation to workout every day and turn my body into some ideal version of myself.

Someday... i'll finally go out for that perfect job, the one that will give me financial security and professional stability and time to devote myself as fully to my Owner as i wish i could.

Someday... i'll be "imperfectly" trained, putting effort into my service out of a deep desire to please, even if the grace and poise i want to show aren't always in evidence.

Someday... i'll find the perfect Master, whose collar i'll proudly wear as i kneel secure in my place at His feet.

Someday...i'll be better, smarter, more.

Someday...

When i discovered SlaveFarm, i discovered a community of people who showed me that i wasn't alone or freakish or just plain wrong for my kinky desires and needs. With the advent of "mainstream" BDSM, i was able to accept the submissive inside me, but here i discovered other people who weren't scared by the word slave, who accepted and embraced the even darker side of sex. However, i got lost in the promise of "someday" and my hopes got lost in the realities of today -- bogged down in the daily slog of work and family and trying to be a good person, good student, good daughter, good employee. i look up and suddenly four years of my life have disappeared into yesterdays. Four years of waiting to meet some metric of who i think i need to be to be worthy, to be enough... of waiting for "someday" to suddenly show up.

Perhaps that's the mystery of someday... How do i keep all those hopes and dreams i want to have "someday" from becoming things i regret i never did?

5
Your rating: None Average: 5 (2 votes)

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.
Harpo's picture

Re: The black hole that is "Someday"

" You better learn it fast; you better learn it young..." Smile

© Copyrights 1997 - 2018 SlaveFarm.com, All rights reserved.
Terms | Privacy | Sitemap | Guide | Support | News | RSS | Billing | Webmasters

18 U.S.C. 2257 Record-Keeping Requirements Compliance Statement
RTA - ASACP