Also I have seen people doing this:  D/d or M/m or something like that.    Why do they do that when writing?

 

This is a hangover from the old chatroom days,(particularly places like IRC)  where the Master or Dom always had upper case letters at the start of their name and the sub/slave had lower, to differentiate one from the other. Hence you still see W/we were wondering if Y/you all liked the games O/other people are playing etc.  Hope that clears up the  "slashy writing" that some people still use in fora and posts.

There you go again Shado scaring me all the time???? What are you trying to do?

Better to be scared and safe then to have no fear and be hurt.

My intent was not to scare you but rather to educate you in the safe and sane ways of this Lifestyle.

ShadoWalker
 

That was why I replied as I did, most of the info on google is warnings about this type of play and wanted you to be safe and very aware of the dangers xxxxx

This is an informational web site that has lots of very good information on almost every subject.

http://www.sexuality.org/l/fetish/aspydang.html 

ShadoWalker

Google erotic asphyxiation and you'll get all the info and pictures you want

Nevermind I guess you don't get it.LOL can this post get deleted?

 

 

Actually, I get it. I understand your frustration at being told at all points that what turns you on more than anything is inherently, incredibly dangerous. I too am an "edge" player. But that doesn't make it less TRUE.

you sound reasonably intelligent and have done some searching. you MUST NOT reject information that tells you that there IS NO SAFE WAY TO PRACTICE asphyxiation. you MUST ACCEPT that it is dangerous and that you may well die. you MUST ACCEPT that risk, and that there is no reasonable way to reduce the risk.

SORRY - but that's life.

Begin with Jay Wiseman's "The Medical Realities of Breath Control Play" if you haven't already.

http://www.telecomassociation.com/pubs/chokinggamereport/files/aea3.htm

among many places, and his personal site

http://www.jaywiseman.com/

Jay is very well respected in the BDSM community. you probably have read his SM 101; if not you ought to. I concur with his methodology and conclusions in that article. Read it carefully, several times, follow the references, educate yourself and your lover on the risks.

Ask specific questions, not just general ones. In this thread, you were misunderstood, and then reacted in frustration that the responses were all of safety.

Consider investing in a cardiac monitor (very expensive, and probably not able to keep you from dying - but it is the only thing that might be able to provide some degree of safety).

View a beautiful film In the realm of the senses, a Japanese film based on a true case of death by erotic asphyxiation in the 1920's (IRCC). Not to scare you away from it, just because it is beautiful.

***

OTOH, last week a man held his breath underwater for over 20 minutes! A new world record.

***

I believe that you asked about contracts. There are two reasons for contracts: 1) a turn-on, putting the relationship in definition, and 2) protection for the top.

Considering protection. It isn't going to give much but it establishes that the relationship and the things that are done are CONSENSUAL. That is important when something goes wrong and police and the law get involved. There is a lot of assumption that a girl bound and tortured by a man has been "taken advantage of". Or that he is somehow doing something wrong.

Consent may not protect the top from the law; he may well go to jail for some form of assault, battery, murder, etc. MANY have. But it at least gives a preliminary defense that a kink-aware lawyer may be able to use.

I ALWAYS USE SOME FORM OF WRITTEN CONTRACT, regardless of how trivial the meeting may be. 

Alan

 

There you go again Shado scaring me all the time???? What are you trying to do?

Better to be scared and safe then to have no fear and be hurt.

My intent was not to scare you but rather to educate you in the safe and sane ways of this Lifestyle.

ShadoWalker