I am an anonimus master. My profile is empty and I will tell you nothing about myself but trust I am an expert master with years of experince. I have very high standards, and you must have absolutely none. A pic is REQURED! Don't expect me to send you a pic, but I might send you some kinky pics I found on the web of girls tied up or with pins in their tits, if you beg enough! You must have big tits and love pain and I don't like girls wearing clothes, so you will never wear them again and You must move to me, probabily half way around the wurld, and this is a permanent position. I will be your GOD and you will call me Lord or Sir. You must worship and obey me no matter what! I will use you until I get bored then you can clean my room while I play video games. You must be quiet because my parents live upstairs. I require a response today because if I don't attract an eager willing cunt with this post, I'll post it again tomorrow in every forum here!!!!!

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Hopefully even the humor-challenged can detect the sarcasm in this post. I was inspired by the trawling I've noticed on this site and others. Spelling and grammar errors were intentional. Perhaps some people will even recognize themselves in this and take it as a gentle, good humored suggestion to try a more enticing and effective approach.